Yes, I got it. You were the 1 message I referred to.

I also got one from Bitchypoo singing a song for me… about a hat.

Now I just need a random guy (or girl- I don’t discriminate and I return the favor hahaha) to moan obscenities and I’ll be set…

I mean… wait, what? :P

1) What do you think 8th grade you would think about present you?

I think 8^th grade me would be surprised that I made it out of high school alive. 8^th grade me was miserable to a degree that is hardly fathomable.  8^th grade me would also wonder why the fuck I bothered going to college after finding out what I do now…. 8^th grade me would be kind of right. :P

2) If you could meet 8th grade you, what would you tell 8th grade version?

8^th grade me had already been pretty well fucked over by her peers. So telling her that their mean hateful comments didn’t matter wouldn’t really amount to much at this point. 8^th grade me is already pretty much fucked.

3) Would you want to know how and when you go?

Actually, yes, I would.  I can understand where a lot of people say that if they knew their lives would be consumed with morbid thoughts. But if you know when and how you’re gonna die, then pretty much everything up to that point is made open for adventure.  I admit I probably wouldn’t take advantage of it, but it’s nice to know that if I’m going to die at 87 I should save up for my old age. However, If I found out I was gonna die in two years, what would be the point of saving? IF I actually had a savings account (which I don’t, cause I be a broke bitch, but you get my point) I’d clean it out and spend my last year traveling, doing something I’ve always wanted to do, but never could justify the expense for. So yes, I would want to know…oh and can you also tell me the winning lotto numbers? :P

4) One food you liked as a kid that you hate now?

I was always a fairly picky eater, so there wasn’t anything I ate then that I wouldn’t eat now.  That being said we use to eat a lot of Rice-a-roni. (If you eat Rice-A-Roni do not read beyond this point, you have been warned).  It use to be pretty cheap (I haven’t bought it in years so I have no clue how much it is now) but I was making it once in college and found a meal worm (or some other little critter that looked like a mini-worm) in the box.  I haven’t been able to even watch someone else eat it, since then, without wanting to gag.

5) What did kid you want to be when you grew up?

I wanted to be a couple of things.  I wanted to be a vet but soon realized that sometimes involved cutting into animals (and not just examining them and administering meds) so that was soon pushed to the way-side.  This was a young aspiration.  As I got older I wanted to either write or be a photographer. Considering my limited skill at both I entertained ideas of maybe being a history professor…until I realized the whole world of “publish or perish”, at which point I said hell no.

So currently, I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. Umm, I guess I’d like to be… Happy? Does that work? :P

1) Movie you either stopped watching or walked out of because it was so bad?

I love movies. Truly, there are only like 3 or 4 movies I’ve ever seen that I felt like I’d wasted my time seeing them.  That being said, I rented “A Serious Man” a few weeks back. 

I literally wanted to demand my money back. It got great reviews so I thought what the hell (like I said a movie has to blow monkey balls for me not to like it even a little bit) so I rented it. 

If you were thinking of seeing “A Serious Man” please, don’t waste over an hour of your life on that crap.  If you already have seen it, well then, my apologies… maybe we could form some sort of support group? :P

2) Pick up line always guaranteed to work?

You don’t need a pickup line with me. Just wear some glasses, and a button up shirt rolled back… it’s like magic. Oh, and using the phrase “come again?” in our first conversation is sure to seal the deal. :P

3) The one food you can’t turn down?

Stuffed shells. Oh my god, I haven’t had these in like 3 years, and a good 5 years before that, but I love them.

They, like waffles, are not safe anywhere near me. So I don’t make them. Trust me, if I did make them, it wouldn’t be pretty, and I’m pretty sure the one time I got arrested for indecent exposure it was a result of a night spent with my face shoved in a pan of stuffed shells. :P

4) Have you ever been told you look like a celeb? Who?

Back in the day the ex (WHO SMOKED CRACK and at the time only had web cam shots to go on…just to clarify) said I looked like a green-eyed Anna Paquin.  When he was really drunk he thought I looked like other celebs but I chalk this up to his liver’s diminishing ability to process alcohol. :P  

Besides,  I said he looked like Guy Pearce…so yeah, we were both full of shit. HA… (but really, he does kind of look like Guy Pearce, it’s quite creepy actually).

5) What makes you laugh the easiest?

Whenever I need a laugh, badly, I pop in Eddie Izzard’s “Dress to Kill” special. I let an intern borrow it last summer and haven’t seen it since, but I love the living shit out of it.  Every single time I watch it, I feel better when I’m done. It’s pure brilliance. If you haven’t seen it, get on it right now. :

1) If you were to “run away” where would we have to look in order to find you?

Oregon. I can’t explain it, but if I ever get the balls, or the finances, to up and leave, you can find me somewhere in Oregon.

2) # 1 adult drink?

Um, I don’t like the taste of cu… oh… ha. My bad. I was confused by the question. I like sweat of a man who has earned said perspiration by dancing to old Richard Simmons work-out videos. Yes, I know that’s not what you meant, but I’m being honest here.:P Don’t judge me. I have refined senses. :P

3) Favorite TV of all time?

I’m guessing you’re asking my favorite TV show of all time? Hmm. That’s a hard one. I’m a big movie/tv fan, so it’ll be hard for me to narrow this down to one.

Uhm.  I guess I’d have to say Saturday Night Live.  I haven’t really been up to date on it for the past 2 or so years, but I love me some SNL. 

4) Black Ink or Blue Ink?

Hot pink. Sharpie Ultra Fine Point.  When I write my stalker love notes, it gives the right balance of girlish cuteness and bat-shit crazy. :P

5) Favorite curse word or phrase

Douchebaggery…or Fucking Fuckwit Fuckers… Cause I’m classy yo. :P